Ed Balls: a nerdy little git who
loves ordering other people’s lives

Quite why Jack Straw is denying having threatened to punch Ed Balls’ lights out is unclear. Balls (Balls by name and Balls by nature) is a bulgy-eyed toad-like squirt who has been in Parliament five minutes, has never had a proper job and gets his jollies by kicking hard-working middle class folk about. Most of us would applaud Jack Straw if he dondered Balls good and proper.

Balls, who reminds some of us of that much loved classic car, the frog-eyed Sprite, is a nerdy class-warrior who observed ‘So what?’ when David Cameron described the UK as having one of the highest levels of taxation. That is just the sort of remark you would expect from a chippy public schoolboy keen to demonstrate his Socialist credentials to the Ovine & Bovine whom he fondly, but almost certainly delusionally, imagines are just bursting to sweep him to the leadership of the Labour Party.

It is also the sort of remark you would expect from a man who, with his hatchet-faced and over-promoted wife, Yvette Cooper, rakes in not one but two loads of Mortgage Allowances, tax-free mind, under the egregious scheme which is currently in place for MPs to enrich their capital position at the Taxpayer’s expense.

Mr. Balls & Mrs. Balls:
No wonder are happy
given all the moolah
they are helping themselves to

So, were Jack Straw to march round and punch those Balls’s two bulging peepers back into his face, the sound of the cheering would be heard from Land’s End to Berwick. And, as Straw is Justice Secretary, this would give a whole new slant to the concept of ‘justice’.