John Prescott, the dimmest dumbcluck ever appointed to Government, had a refined way of campaigning: if someone expressed dissent by, say, hurling a nicely over-ripe tomato at him, he would retaliate by smacking the tomato-flinger smartly on the snout in best Hull Ferry Steward style. Smuggo’s friend, Nicholas Sarkozy, also knows a thing or two about charming birds off trees.

In proof of which I bring you this quite splendid video from YouTube via le Parisen.

All you need to know is that the gentleman in the crowd declines to shake Sarkozy’s hand on the perfectly reasonable grounds (if you do not like the man) that he does not want to get his hand dirty.

Sarkozy responds in kind which I have rendered into modern day vernacular English (those faint of heart should stop reading now!):

“Bugger off then, you stupid fuckwit!”, smiling all the while and calmly walks away.

Somehow I do not see either Gordon or Dave emulating him, though I guess Charlie ‘Mine’s A Large Double’ Kennedy might have done something similar when in his cups.

A propos of which, anyone reading Sir Ming Campbell’s somewhat anodyne account of Kennedy’s blotto period might be inclined to ask how it was that the Lib ‘Dems’ had the brass neck to advance to the country as potential Prime Minister (as in ‘I have my finger on the nuclear button’) a man they knew full well spent much of his time drinking himself into a state of sodden oblivion. And how they explain away the collective lie in which they colluded for years to the effect that their man was suffering from this or that ailment or was tired after a night feeding the baby.

By dissembling, as usual, I suppose.

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