The Huntsman is always cheered by potential ‘dog bites man’ stories and so proffers the following from the Daily Telegraph:

Dorset Diver Wrestles Three Foot Lobster

A diver told today how he wrestled with a three-foot lobster after it attacked him.

Chris Hovard, 51, was diving when the 10lbs 4oz lobster approached him near Weymouth jetty, in Dorset, yards from where children were swimming.

He was forced to wrestle the terrifying crustacean, estimated to be 50 years old, into a string bag after it scuttled towards him with snapping claws on Saturday.

Mr Hovard said: “I was diving when I spotted an old boiler which I believe may have been used in the Nothe Fort in the olden days and then was thrown into the sea when it was no longer needed.

“I was swimming around it when the lobster came at me, its claws snapping.

“I could hardly get my hand across the back of its shell. You’d need a saddle to ride it. I managed to get it with a pincer movement.”

He added: “The commotion stirred up a silt cloud which momentarily stunned him and this was when I managed to grab him.”

Mr Hovard, who lives in Wyke Regis, Dorset, has been diving for 34 years and said he has never seen a lobster anywhere near this size.

Animal lovers will be pleased to learn that the lobster, nicknamed Lemmy after the weather-beaten singer in rock band Motorhead, will not be boiled in a kitchen and served up on a restaurant plate.

As he is too big to fit in a cooking pot, Lemmy was taken to the Sea Life Park in Weymouth where he has gone on display.

The Northe Fort is a restored Victorian fort now used as museum.

Actually this enormous creature would have quite unsuitable as culinary material because lobsters of this size are terribly tough. One wonders why he was not put back into the sea where he could father loads more of his ilk. Still, he can live to a ripe old age terrifying schoolkids, I suppose, though that will not give him anywhere near as much pleasure as a nice Lady Lobster.